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From: Wedding Palace Visitor
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Question: In September of 2009 I became engaged. From the very beginning my soon to be wife and I started planning our wedding around my Brother, who is a Marine. He is my best friend and best man. At the time he was stationed in Japan. After extensive talk with him, the best solution we had was to wait until May 2011 to have a better chance of him being able to attend. It was very difficult for my future wife and I to plan our wedding because everything I did was based around doing my best to ensure that he would be there. Our plans came to a stand still when he became engaged in the spring of 2010 and they planned a November 2010 wedding. My fiance was upset because they didn't even consult us and we had been basing all of our decisions around them. Now he would need to use his leave for his own wedding and would possibly not be able to attend our wedding, which we waited 20 months for to accommodate my brother's situation. I assured my fiance that it was all good and not to over react. We just let it go. My brother announced last month that in September of 2010 he will be moving back home to be stationed on the east coast. This gave us the small window of October to plan a wedding that I KNOW he can attend. With his coming back to the U.S. there is a greater risk that he will be sent to a war zone, possibly around the time we were planning to get married. Our wedding was rescheduled to a month before theirs. His is in NY, mine is in MD. Our guest list is 160 people, but shares less than 30 people with my brother's wedding. He also has "home field" advantage because most of the shared people live locally to where he is being married. Everything that we did, we did with the best intentions because I really want my brother to be my best man. His future bride is now up in arms about us stealing their thunder and accusing us of wedding "faux paus" by having our wedding so close to theirs. We rearranged our plans to do our best to make sure my brother could attend, as it was very important to me. Did we commit some sort of terrible wedding etiquette sin? Or is my soon to be sister in law overreacting?

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