Response: I would not verbally ask someone if they want to come to the wedding, then not send an invitation if they say they cant. Rather, decide on the close family and friends and invite them. The choice is theirs whether they attend or not. If you want to have a reception the following summer, that is fine.
Invitations to the wedding are sent before the wedding. Invitations to the reception are sent 4 to 6 weeks before the reception.
Anyone invited to a shower should also be invited to the wedding. Therefore, a small shower that includes those being invited to the wedding could be held.
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